​6:30am flight out of BWI. I am quite the early bird but man, more coffee is needed. I am annoyed that I got coffee from Chick fil A before seeing Mayorga.
Oh, Southwest, I still love you and yes, BWI beat out flying out of Dulles because I really dislike O’Hare. Granted, Midway reminds me of the last trip we took to Cincinnati to get Hadi t-cells in an attempt to fight the adenovirus (we connected in Chicago). Hadi was in a helicopter but Aamir and I had to fly separately. The first helicopter ride, I was with him. I remember him saying he wasn’t going to rub it in Zakaria’s face that he got to ride in a helicopter.
Free movie on the plane. Any guesses on what I watched? Sparky Palastro is your hint. Decided to travel to Chicago for QuadM and my favorite duo, Mommying While Muslim. Also, I love traveling. I will not weigh in on Uzma and Zaiba’s disagreement on Garrett’s popcorn but I will most likely try some stuffed pizza and pretend that I still prefer it over New York style pizza. 
The DNC Convention starts on Monday. Wondering if I will see some of the set up and/or attendees/protestors. I have been in the DMV area for over 20 years but I love coming back to the Midwest. I moved from Kansas to D.C. to work on Capitol Hill. How different my life is now. I met up with old friends who were some of the first people I met in Virginia. 20 some years later and they still had me laughing until I cried. Also, Tyson’s Galleria and a Shotted pistachio latte is slowly becoming part of my self care, even if the caffeine increases my anxiety and there are far too many people.
As for those who reached out in regards to planning events, you best believe lists and ideas are being put together. Keep em coming. 😊


6:30am flight out of BWI. I am quite the early bird but man, more coffee is needed. I am annoyed that I got coffee from Chick fil A before seeing Mayorga.
Oh, Southwest, I still love you and yes, BWI beat out flying out of Dulles because I really dislike O’Hare. Granted, Midway reminds me of the last trip we took to Cincinnati to get Hadi t-cells in an attempt to fight the adenovirus (we connected in Chicago). Hadi was in a helicopter but Aamir and I had to fly separately. The first helicopter ride, I was with him. I remember him saying he wasn’t going to rub it in Zakaria’s face that he got to ride in a helicopter.
Free movie on the plane. Any guesses on what I watched? Sparky Palastro is your hint. Decided to travel to Chicago for QuadM and my favorite duo, Mommying While Muslim. Also, I love traveling. I will not weigh in on Uzma and Zaiba’s disagreement on Garrett’s popcorn but I will most likely try some stuffed pizza and pretend that I still prefer it over New York style pizza. 
The DNC Convention starts on Monday. Wondering if I will see some of the set up and/or attendees/protestors. I have been in the DMV area for over 20 years but I love coming back to the Midwest. I moved from Kansas to D.C. to work on Capitol Hill. How different my life is now. I met up with old friends who were some of the first people I met in Virginia. 20 some years later and they still had me laughing until I cried. Also, Tyson’s Galleria and a Shotted pistachio latte is slowly becoming part of my self care, even if the caffeine increases my anxiety and there are far too many people.
As for those who reached out in regards to planning events, you best believe lists and ideas are being put together. Keep em coming. 😊

It is hard to believe I have an eighth grader. It is August, 2024. Five years ago, on my son’s first day of school, I learned from my son that my marriage was over. It is often said that time heals. How much time are we talking? How in the world is this summer almost over? Zakaria and I went to Deep Creek last weekend and it was lovely. I forgot how incredible it is to look up into the sky and see so many stars. There was also hiking and apparently Pokemon like to hike as well. Pokemons?  Apparently Pokemon is a thing again. Zakaria is using Hadi's old account and I am sure some people are confused. I still am clueless about the whole thing but it did make me smile thinking of Hadi walking around NIH with his nurses looking for Pokemon. 
As the school year begins, I find myself wondering what it is that I want to do with my time. I recently helped a friend plan her 5 year old's birthday party and it was awesome. You know there was a spreadsheet and utilizing my skills to ensure it was a memorable experience was really sweet. Not so subtle of a plug for you to hire me to manage your events. ;) If you also want me to plan your travel, I am all for it. What else shall I look into? What gives you joy/fulfills you? 
​I haven't written in awhile but heard from a few people that commented about enjoying reading my posts in the pasts so I figured I would give it a go again.

Zakaria is getting braces and I am tearing up. His dentist and orthodontist are in the same office. I am remembering when I first brought Hadi and Zakaria here. They were fascinated by Mr. Slurpy.
I remember when I had my braces and being introduced to dental wax. Good stuff. Favorite conversation with Zakaria about braces. I told him I know he is a rule follower but that I didn’t always follow the food rules with my braces. His response-“We both know I am not going to, I am gonna have some popcorn.”
Ad astra per aspera. That’s on the Kansan flag. To the stars through difficulties. I might have been in the DMV area for over 20 years but I will always be a Kansan. Watching that game last night…seriously, Jayhawks, why you gotta be like that. Rock Chalk. Thinking about sitting with my beautiful Hadi while he filled out his brackets. Wonder what he thinks about Kentucky. Hadi was intense with his brackets. Wanted to know about statistics and everything. Zakaria…eh, I will just use yours, Mommy.
We handed out iftar to a local community yesterday for Team Watience. Thank you to all those who donated towards this. I went with cheesesteaks and chicken sandwiches. One of the youngins said to his friend…halal steak is the best. Same kid put on a Team Watience shirt after hearing about Hadi.
I am sure the tears will flow after I drop Zakaria off at school. Ceasefire on Jummah? Ya Allah, please. #freepalestine #jayhawks #braces #marchmadness #aplasticanemia #brackets

​Ya ever just look at someone and be like, I am so glad God put you in my life? I was a little concerned that I didn’t have any messages from Zaiba T. Hasan at 4am the day of the Mommying While Muslim/HAWA event. 5:30am is when she requested me to print bathroom signs. I had lunch with Uzma Jafri and Bronislava Shmilovich on Friday before the event and man, I needed Zaiba there to help me reel in the innuendos. 🙁
Event mode Saira doesn’t really have time for emotions and I held them in while Zakaria set up the booth for Team Watience and man, watching him school me on how things should be done was pretty awesome. The tears started when ADAMS BEAT starting singing at the gala. Watching Hurunnessa Fariad’s do her thing. MashAllah. Woman entrepreneurs, amazing performers, dabka and tatreez. Being asked how one can join the registry. ❤️www.bethematch.org 
I wasn’t sure if I was going to speak but when Uzma put her arm around me and asked if I was up for it…I felt determined to walk up on that stage in my Vans and not trip on my abaya.
Continuing this journey with all of you has been special and I truly thank MommyingWhileMuslim for ensuring that I continue to help others in honor of Hadi. 
Stay tuned. 
#muslimmom #aplasticanemia #womenentrepreneurs 
#grief #vans

Who is the emo kid?
We have a white board up at work and staff members write questions on it.
I recently asked for everyone’s favorite poem. Mine is Harlem/A Dream Deferred by Langston Hughes. My co/worker was reading the responses and asked…”who is the emo kid?” when he read mine.
I wonder how much emotion one can hold in? Tomorrow is the last day of Ramadan and yes, I will caress my coffee at 8am on Eid day, I can’t help but feeling sad and missing Zakaria’s conversations at 5:30am in the morning.
My therapist asks how things make me feel all the time and will stop me if I just want you to jump to the next part of a story. I don’t like her…which, for me, means that she’s good.
Sad, that’s how I am feeling. Sad that Iowa lost but also, Dawn Staley, you are a beast. Sad that, pretty sure I won’t stay awake for the Purdue game but knowing that my nephew is there now…yeah, I am old. Sad thinking that it would have been incredible to watch Hadi watch the finals and scream out booya and smile knowing he picked that up from me.
Sad that we still are asking where the humanity is. I am more than just sad, I am angry. #FreePalestine
Sad thinking about two young men whose lives recently were taken too soon by separate auto accidents. I asked one of the family members how she was holding up….her response, “Alhumdulillah, we are heartbroken but trust in Allah’s plan”.
Zakaria and I gave condolences to one of the families yesterday. A bereaved mother. The shock clear on her face. The rawness of life.
I am waiting for Zakaria to come out of his drama class. A huge bird just flew by. I focused on Surah Mulk during Hadi’s last days at Children’s.
“Do they not see the birds above?”